I’m feeling oddly motivated today, despite the fact that the hot weather is making me quite drowsy and low energy. I have a moon app (yup, that’s right) and today is a full moon, or the Buck Moon (my last name is Hart, an old word for ‘stag’) and the moon is in Capricorn which means I have ALL THE POWER, probably. That’s how it works right?
Pretty proud of myself this morning, I wrote my first ever Sestina! I was inspired by some new work by Deanna Rodger that I’ve been reading over. She’s a wonderful poet who is currently embarking on an Instagram project called @whoknowspoetry, as a sought after poetry educator, I cannot recommend following this page enough! A Sestina is quite hard to do, but really fun. You start with six lines, the last word on every line becomes your six words that you must put on the end of every line in five more stanzas, in different orders. Here’s a snippet at my attempt:
The train is uncomfortable
to sit on, back too straight
kick the seat in front
I feel older than ever
As if age is really some great front
that we all bravely appear
for, in a queue for, well, ever.
We all wanted to be straight
before we got wet between the legs
and made PE uncomfortable.
What’s great is that I started off talking about a train journey, which I always find really uncomfortable, I am aware of my body so much when trying to sit on public transport. It quickly turned into something on queerness, and feeling uncomfortable because of that instead. Shocked myself I did! Sometime writing in form can be quite daunting, and I feel self conscious like some Oxford professor is going to pop up behind my sofa and scoff: ‘What are you doing, Bridget? Stop before you hurt yourself!’ This never happens of course, and I always surprise myself. Today I will walk down the street thinking about how I wrote a Sestina today, and that’s pretty great.
In other news, I am preparing for a gig this Saturday at the Chelsea! The LAD$ Collective are doing a bit of a summer party to raise some funds, sell the new zine and just hang out! I’ve been quite anxious, and therefore avoiding details because I haven’t put on a gig since before Stace died and it is quite stressful! I think we’re on top of it though, after a discussion. H and I had a big honest chat about our anxieties and limitations, and we came up with solutions to help lighten each other’s loads. I think it’s really important to create space for these conversations. I have denied myself so many experiences in the past because of my own limitations, and the fact that stress is a big trigger for me, but actually sometime pressure is good, it’s healthy. It’s important to overcome and achieve, so that you have more ammo next time the demons come back. We’re really excited to have a DJ set from Suniti Sunmonkey, and bands Aufbau Principle and GHUM play on Saturday. We also have a pop disco, garden games and mocktails (affectionally called CuntTails). We wanted to make the event as accessible to everyone as we could, so we’re starting at 3pm for you to be able to bring your families. Find out more info by clicking the image below:
I am also really happy about this month’s Chips and Beans episode! It’s a special one, featuring interviews, clips and tracks from Decolonise Fest at DIY Space for London! My co-host Cassie went along for the weekend to enjoy a space for people of colour, by people of colour. The interviews with organisers Marcus and Estella are really informative and interesting. We’ve included tracks from CECILIA and WEEDRAT, so make sure you listen to EPISODE 14!
Anyway guys, it’s hot, I’m already ready for bed, but it’s X-Ray Spexicise tonight so I’ve got to get my energy up! Stay hydrated, pals. x